masters
Temporiser
Another quote from Modjeska's Timepieces which caught my attention as I think it describes the mindset of many a diarist:
I think I'm a temporiser. It's a term Andre Aciman uses of himself, and of a certain sort of memorist, of whom the greatest- the incomparable- exampe, is Proust. Temporising, in Aicman's view, is an attitude of mind which develops in certain people who can find themselves engulfed, even tipped off balance, by the sadness of the present. The incurable imperfection in the very essence of the present, Proust says..... they slip into other time frames; in other words they play with time. They propel themselves into wishful thinking, fantasising, all kinds of story telling, as a way of coaxing life into more controllable possibilities. They return to a troubled present once it has passed and reconsider it from a safer vantage point. A life of imagination, lived on the page, takes on a reality that can be a powerful as the reality their body inhabits.
It goes on, but I'll stop there. It interests me, this idea of not being able to think of the present while the present is happening, but choosing to leap, cat-like, into a tree while the paint of today dries. Writing a journal allows you to fix the details that were not quite right as they were happening, and to scrub out the things you do not want to think about. It makes me think that the process of diary-writing is as much about the things you want to forget as it is about the things you want to remember.